Leadership & Self-Deception: Iyanla Vanzant Apologizes to Oprah

Today’s Oprah Show featuring Iyanla Vanzant was one of the most powerful representations of conflict management and resolution that I’ve seen on television. This clip from the beginning of the show demonstrates the kind of leadership that I’ve written about for the last two weeks in my articles on Leadership & Self-Deception (begins here and continues for 6 parts).

In Iyanla’s estimation, Oprah had let her down ten years ago when Oprah decided not to go forward with a show that she offered to produce for Iyanla. Oprah did not go forward because she thought that is what Iyanla wanted. But because Iyanla had low self-esteem and betrayed herself, she blamed Oprah for her misfortune. She did not blame Oprah because she is a bad person. She blamed Oprah because her “deserve” level was so low that she believed Oprah only wanted her work and not her. So Iyanla then found a way to sabotage their relationship. Self-betrayal and self-sabotage from low self-esteem often keep leaders stuck and from becoming all they are intended to be and want to be.

The first step out of the box is to begin to see the other person as a person, as someone that we love and respect, and then apologize. Watch what Iyanla does here, then pick up Iyanla’s extraordinary new book: Peace from Broken Pieces.

Iyanla Vanzant Apologizes to Oprah – Video – Oprah.com.

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  1. Carol Edwards…

    […]8 Thank you for taking time to write down this write-up. It is been very help xw[…]…



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